We Can’t Change What We Don’t Acknowledge
Being able to take a hard look
I put a pair of black lace underwear in the drawer where my husband’s girlfriend left her lingerie. I guess I was marking my territory. I knew it was a little fucked up, but I had a secret wish to make her uncomfortable in the vacation home I shared with my husband for 14 years. He moved out of the marital home and took up residence there nearly four years ago.
I’d already found the dress I left in the drawer in this story neatly folded in the drawer where I keep my things:
I didn’t mention the events in that story to Rex until after the fact even though he was spending that weekend there with me. This weekend I told him that she had removed her things. He said he had no interest in seeing her lingerie.
When we were packing up to leave on Sunday, I showed him the underwear I put in the empty drawer. He suggested that I not do that because it would be “healthier” for me. Hmm. I put the underwear back in my bag.
In thinking about his comment going forward, I realized my antics were keeping me stuck in the past. My actions certainly didn’t make me feel good about myself.
Having the ability to see how we are stunting our own growth is difficult, but figuring it out is the first step toward effecting healthy changes.
Thank you for reading :)
