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The Scars From Emotional Abuse

You Can’t See Them

Psychological and emotional abuse are insidious. The damage is often invisible to people on the outside looking in. There are no bruises, stitches, broken skin or broken bones. However, the wounds from this type of abuse leave scars that never go away.

It is often said that narcissistic personality disorder is relatively rare and can only be diagnosed by a trained professional. It is much more common in men. That being said, women are often abused by men with narcisstic tendencies or traits even if a full blown disorder is not present.

In my own case, I feel the residue of my situation in my hesitancy to even talk about it. I minimize what happened. I compare it to cases that are more severe and feel like I have no right to complain.

It didn’t feel like my husband systematically tried to destroy my self esteem. It just got chipped away in small pieces. It was so gradual and over so many years that I barely noticed. From the way things appeared on the outside, he looked like he was a very loving and devoted husband. In fact, he really was at first. He was definitely always on the selfish side, but I told myself that no one is perfect and marriage means having to constantly adjust to your spouse’s shortcomings.