I received what I thought was an odd text message last night. He said the police had just left his home. He wanted to know if I was available to talk. The reason I thought this was strange was because I had met this man twice. His message sounded like there was a serious situation going on, but I found it strange that he wanted to talk to me about it. I have noticed lately that if I talk or text with a man more than twice, we seem to be in a relationship. I think this is symptomatic of a pervasive sense of isolation many of us feel. We want to feel connected to someone.
I did call the man about the police being at his house. He and I connected on OKCupid, went out to dinner, he observed a horseback riding lesson, and we went out to lunch that same day. That is 2 dates in my book. We did seem to have a good rapport. We have spoken on the phone several times and text often. I suppose I was seeking connection, too, if I was on OKCupid. I knew he is in the middle of a divorce after a 28 year marriage. He obviously just needed someone to talk to after he told his wife he was going to use her car because his was in the shop, and she got upset, left in her car, and returned with the police. Nothing became of the incident because there was no threat of violence, but the police were required to show up and make sure. We followed up with each other on the phone about some messages we were sending about another possible date this weekend.
It is also common for a “texting relationship” to begin after only 1 date. I get check in type messages, we well as “good night/morning, hope you sleep well, have a good day” that I don’t expect from someone I have met once. But, I suppose if I have given out my phone number, I may be suffering from a sense of isolation that even a phone connection might ameliorate.
Thank you for reading :)