Someone asks you out. It’s kind of exciting. Perhaps you connected online. You have a photo and some limited information about the person. You may have a fantasy about what they are like IRL. You set a date, time and place to meet.

The initial excitement slowly starts to fade as you realize you are going to have to shower, dress, accessorize, and navigate to the agreed upon meeting place. Then go through the awkward effort of trying to find each other in a public location.

Depending on the type of date you will have to try to engage in pleasant conversation for a period of time, and smile.

I suppose the level of motivation we have for meeting someone special will determine the amount of effort and patience we have for this process.

My niece and I both had dates scheduled today with men we connected with online. We each admitted we started the day hoping he would cancel so we wouldn’t have to go. Neither of us wanted to be the one to come up with the lame excuse for why we couldn’t make it.

I made the effort today. I was pleasantly surprised and felt it was worthwhile. It was one cup of coffeee, one hour, some good conversation, and a few laughs with a handsome charming guy. I’m not invested in what comes next.

My niece is still in the hoping he cancels stage.

I coined the term “date waiting” to describe this up and down emotional time between setting a date and actually going. I think I learned today that I am not motivated to continue to date around. I have enough friends and lovers to keep me company for now, and prefer to avoid date waiting.

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